morning

I wonder what it is about mornings that is so appealing. I know that poem down there lists a lot of good reasons, but there's something that feels so clean about the very beginning of the day. Maybe it's all the hope that the rest of the day holds - just the fact that you have no idea what's really gonna go down even if you know exactly everything there is on your to do list. What kind of people will you meet? What kinds of things will do [not] accomplish? What kinds of donuts will you eat at what kinds of coffee shops you'll discover? Does the last sentence actually make grammatical sense? Not sure, but chin chin clink clink, here's to the beauty of a personal blog.

t-giving chin chins

I just watched this tedtalk by Tony Robbins who is this self-help inspirational speaker extraordinaire ba-flaire bo-hair, and he said something about how there are only like six emotions - six categories that alll emotions can be boiled down to, essentially, among allll the subtle varieties that we feel - and lots of us tend to feel only one, given any circumstance. There are people who, no matter the circumstance, find a way to get angry. There are others, who, find joy or gratitude in all situations, bleak or beautiful.

I want to be someone who feels gratitude at the core of every circumstance. Someone who takes the inexplicable beauty of every single morning as a true, exaggeratedly sparklesome, and rare GIFT that it is, bed hair and morning breath all accounted for.

My beautiful, "breath of fresh air" friend told me about this zen thing she does whenever she finds herself getting annoyed at frustratingly small and petty things - she closes her eyes and goes from toes up to the her head, cataloging all the things she's thankful for.

"I am thankful for my toes, that help me balance."
"I am thankful for my feet, that allow me to walk."
"I am thankful for my calves, which have recently lost some size in girth. Hallelujah"

Those may or may not have been edited according to my personal takes on how I am thankful for my body parts, not quotes from the friend.

But edited or not, this is a beautiful thing to do! And to add a layer of giving credit where it's due (always a good thing), let me add these words of thanks to the creator of the toes, of the feet, of the calves, and of that loss in girth. Hallelujah indeed.

Dear God, thank you for this body you have made so wonderfully and fearfully. Thank you for my mind that accepts and formulates these thoughts, thank you for fingers to type it out here so I can keep these good records of grace.

Thank you for the teeny sense of accomplishment I will feel after pressing the Publish button, and thank you for the fact that my little sister is in love right now, and it is cute, and thank you that I can appreciate it as a cute and nice phenomenon. And not be jealous. Though honestly, this is certainly not always the case. (Aside: please let me always be able to step out of myself enough to ask "What?" when she flutters over and sighs in that contented in-love way, in that I wanna talk about my boyfriend to you right now way.) Thank you for your provisions for my family. Thank you for the fact that I grew up in the states. Thank you for this heart for your people. Thank you for tears.

Thank you for my toes, that help me to balance.
Thank you for my feet, each one with just the right number of phalanges and balls and heels.
Thank you for my calves that support everything else, and thank you for the everything else.

Ah. Thank you.