madisonstheoryofrelativity.net

"BUTTERFLIES = SUGAR SQUARETON RAINBOWS"

Nope, that's not the theory of relativity.
Neither is THIS. Not the one this post is going to be about, anyway, though that's a pretty important one by a pretty special guy. I GUESS. Anyways...(it's hard to focus when Maddie the roomster is being so hyper without me/listening to her hippy-dippy musicz eyy shoutout)

Anyhow --
zomg I cannot believe this, but this is something I always "zomg-I-cannot-believe-this" at whenever I feel that a major time span has been covered in my life. Year-ends, birthdays, the beginnings and ends of summertime, the Russian national day of reproduction...all the important timespan-milestones. Though it has never been too significant in my life before, since the only classes that changed in elementary, middle, high school semester by semester were P.E./Health (blech/blech), the end of this semester is freaking special so special too special. I'll never live another first semester of first year ever again. I know, I know - on that kind of specificity level, it's pretty unlikely that anything will ever be unspecial blahdi-blahblah, but really what a huge milestone we have all just lived. WE ONLY HAVE SEVEN LEFT AH (oops just generalized the whole world as experiencing the same things that I experience. selfish.) Ahh first semester. I can't even talk about it right now, not yet. Ask me a semester later.

ANYHOW ---
so first semester classes are done! Done like turkeys, all of them (guh I keep forgetting about finals but yeah).

Let's have a conversation right now (sorry, I know you don't have much choice in agreeing or not agreeing to my whims of having a conversation with you right now or not):
me - can you belieeeeeeeve first semester is already over?!
you - oh I know - it's so crazy! it went by so fast
me - yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeah...yyyyy

After having that same (stunted, kinda-one-sided) conversation over and over after all the time milestones listed above &etc., I came to the conclusion that is now madisonstheoryofrelativity. Hm I've actually never thought of it all as one word before, but it seems kind of catchy. Hmmmaybe.

SO THERETHUSFORTHLY ----
here's finally the explanation. I think I need another conversation.
me -  (cont. from above yyyyyy)yyyyyyeah. SO I HAVE THIS THEORY.
you - oh rearry.
me - yeah it's called the theory of...eh heh...relativity.
you - ah. hah.
me - so when you're two years old, one year is half of your life, right?
you - yuss.
me - and when you're nineteen, one year is...one nineteeth of your life, right?
you - yusss.
me - SO. RELATIVE to you and your life experiences, that "1/19" year is much shorter than the "1/2" year you spent as a human being. RIGHT?! And every year that passes by is relatively shorter and shorter -  a smaller and smaller segment of your life as a whole!


you - oh. yeah. mhm.


me - yap that's it.

Haha so there's my theory of relativity. Man I really hope I didn't mess that up with my general incoherency. And I was hoping to make the 'you' end of the conversation more easily applicable to whoever ends up reading this by making it as generic and devoid of personality as possible, but I guess that's sort of a contradiction, too - more widely applicable generality...no one is "devoid of personality. And if someone is, that's sort of a personality on its own anyways. Oh well.

And I don't know what big thing I think I am, but I was honestly surprised when someone told me that other people have had this thought before me. Oh hey... What a fool I am pahah